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OUTSIDER

by Bridget Allan

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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Cardboard sleeve, super cute! My second album 'Outsider'.

    Includes unlimited streaming of OUTSIDER via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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1.
OUTLAW 04:37
We are all unpaid actors  In an honest lie  I wish I could scream, But all I do is write about where I was raised.  I think someone is getting murdered on my street. My friends are all mad at the world  In the dark, as we walking you home, you say “nothing is real”  I hated the fact I got anxious, so I say to myself:  You are safe You are loved  You are safe  You are loved 
 We ignore the lies, that the one guy on TV gives us on a spoon.  The newspaper headlines give me a migraine, but I never look away.  I fall into the chasm of sleep, my last thought the colour of your eyes.  And as I toss and cry, I see a note on my wall:  My Minds in the velvet underground.  You are  safe You are loved  You are safe You are loved 
 As The dusk strains from the night,      I know I’m an outlaw, Walking on a road, where I never see cars.  IM A starving artist,  a left-handed mind  Soulmates with a notebook. My Mind in the velvet underground.  There is nowhere to run, I’m in love with you… I don’t wanna open my eyes sometimes, and find the wrong truth There is no-one born with the same soul, I'm in love with you  For now  I'm in love with you                             For now….
2.
PLUTO 03:29
I love you so I’ll stay alive I love you so I’ll stay alive At first, being happy was a fright  Paying attention to this random sadness is a useless magic  Underneath the streetlights  Isn’t it said we may never travel the stars? We are so cold and small          The sun is a distant neighbour  I’m the biggest outsider I know 
 You know I hate it when you yell at me in your mind But the volume of  the voice in my head never changes My heartbeats are irregular when I see you Our dynamics refuse to change, We are.a silent orchestra  I love you so I’ll stay alive I love you so I’ll stay alive                      At first, being happy was a fright  Paying attention to this random sadness is a useless magic  Underneath the streetlights  No matter how mean you are to my mind, I just wanna get back to you                          Oh I wanna get back to you  No matter how mean you are to my mind, I just wanna get back to you  Oh I wanna get back to you  I love you so I’ll stay alive I love you so I’ll stay alive     At first, being happy was a fright but now I’m fine Underneath the streetlights in the dark 
3.
It's funny how my mind goes numb coming here Always on the train again Involuntarily following the future backwards The government is useless I hear You saw them stamp his head in I refuse to think it has to be like this Yelling and running But no-one is coming, to pick up the fallen man. It’s too much, nothing is happening My brain is so loud and it's silent outside I’m surviving but I’m drowning I feel bad for the rest of you, almost, you haven’t suffered You spend your life watching others get kicked in the head Drunk on ecstasy you feel the bursts of light. And the wordless voice pulls you in. This is world is a velvety fire 
 I’m worried I am doing nothing Shouldn’t I be doing something? I wish I could fight for the soul underneath your blood to stay alive. But you stay lying there on the cement I sling my gracefully falling apart bag over my back, 
 It’s too much, nothing is happening My brain is so loud and it's silent outside I’m surviving but I’m drowning Please wake up, I say Blood on the driveway. Silent lies Violent crimes Please wake up, I say Blood on the driveway. Please wake up, I say Blood on the driveway. Love me Oh please love me love me love me love me love me Oh please love me love me love me love me love me Oh please love me love me love me love me love me Oh please love me love me love me love me love me oooooooh
4.
People make me uneasy, we are not human.  Am I the villain of this story? I am so faint and outside my body, I have never handled the hot sun well.  My room will be a black hole, I haven’t been home all weekend.         All the fire in my tank has been given to other people emotions.
 I’ll always be ready to leap into cold water to you, Walking in the dark, my fingers burn.                      Ashes in my eyes. I look over my shoulder and squeeze your hand. This land is apart of me, and all I've got is these 12 notes. And how you all show me the world. Oh I’m all I’ve got  I’m all I’ve got  Hello brother, we are all either of us will have.              We are the change we want to see. I’ll be brave as long you mirror, are not a stranger to me  I have compassion exhaustion and cuts on my hands from opening bottles, You said: I want to remember every time you looked into my green eyes that night.  It makes me cry when I should smile.        Oh I’m all I’ve got                                 Hello brother, we are all either of us will have. We are the change we want to see. I’ll be brave as long you mirror, are not a stranger to me     Oh we are all I’ve got we are all I’ve got           Hello brother Hello brother It makes me cry when I should smile
5.
6.
HEROINE 04:02
Worst comes to worst I can run away and give up on family. Except giving me reason to hide, what good have done for me? Id send you a letter but I don’t know if you’re in a grave or not. So Instead I choke on fake bliss. I let my money control me, when will I smoke my love again? Will it be in the dark with people I secretly hate? In that we are the same, I bring shame to myself I want your needle in my arm, Life’s so grand with you its unbearable without But I’ve never been so ashamed before of the coward I am deep down. I want your needle in my arm, Life’s so grand with you its unbearable without Chorus People are joining too young these days to a winner-less war, you are not brave, you are a puppet On bullshit more poisonous than you know Yet I let my money control me, when will I smoke my love again? Will it be in the dark with people I secretly hate? In that we are the same, I bring shame to myself. I want your needle in my arm, Life’s so grand with you its unbearable without But I’ve never been so ashamed before of the coward I am deep down. I want your needle in my arm, Life’s so grand with you its unbearable without But I’ve never been so down, Because in the visions of see of the world in the future, I’m dead and gone. If only someone loved me As I did my teddy bear as a kid Then maybe I wouldn’t be here in a drain fading away alone If only someone loved me As I did my teddy bear as a kid Then maybe I wouldn’t be here in a drain fading away alone If only someone loved me As I did my teddy bear as a kid Then maybe I wouldn’t be here in a drain fading away alone, blood dripping off my arm I am in no way a hero I don’t wanna be here I don’t wanna be here
7.
Some would say you're a soft guy with stabs of violence, Everyone seems to hear nothing and say nothing. Your yelling does nothing but show me you’re afraid of a teenager, who’s taller than you.  What kind of person bullies someone a sixth of their own age?  I don’t care if you’re dad was the same, change your ways  No one cares your friends are the successful ones.   A wash of sound goes through my ears, the words have no effect, when there’s never any action.  I know I’m not the only experience your foul play. If only your daughter knew you don’t see her as an equal human.  Put me under pressure, but you’ll never see me crack.  Oh put me under pressure but you’ll never stop my fire.  I’m sure lots of therapists know your name.
 No one cares your friends are the successful ones.   A wash of sound goes through my ears, the words have no effect, when there’s never any action.  I know I’m not the only experience your foul play. If only your daughter knew you don’t see her as an equal human.  Put me under pressure, but you’ll never see me crack.  Oh if you Put me under pressure, but you’ll never see me crack.  You will never see me cry, You will never kill my fire You will never see me cry, You will never kill my fire You will never see me cry, You will never see me cry, You will never leave this town and I’m already gone. You will never leave this town and I’m already gone. I will not be known as the kid bullied by an old man Walk away from me. 
8.
I don’t want to know any more than I already do  The world is unfair and I cont stop picking my skin and pulling my hair  The world is on fire, can you please tell me why now I feel like a pointless adventurer just going where has already been found  So its let's get a cigarette and celebrate the world before it gets worse  I've lost a lot of friends  Sometimes I forget the sound of my talking voice  and strangers scare me to death, I hope you don’t think I glare at you too long on the bus 
 The world is on fire, can you please tell me why now I’m so damn impatient I drain away the seconds with you all You say come back to see me if it gets worse  Who knows why  I’m so attracted to breaking the law       All the worst people are in charge of the world Please give us one pure drop of sanity, we need it  Please give us one pure drop of peace now, oh heal us  Please give each other one pure drop of love Love love 
 The world is on fire The world is on fire
9.
Doomed to be together, You sold me out again I don’t know whether I should kick you out the door? Should you be constantly visiting someone who sets you on fire? But don’t fade out of my heart, We’ve known each other too long It's out of our controlling grasp now  You’re the worst and best part of me  Roadside people walk unhurriedly  This chest of mine palpitates, And victory I rarely taste  Public trains make me feel connected to the world  When I'm detached from you all  But don’t fade out of my heart, We’ve known each other too long It's out of our controlling grasp now  You’re the worst and best part of me  But don’t fade out of my heart, We’ve known each other too long It's out of our controlling grasp now  You’re the worst and best part of me  I never wouldn’t have loved you after you were told to leave. You said you’re not perfect, And who would believe me if I tried to be  You said you’re not perfect, And who would believe me if I tried to be  I hate that the driving cars look at us, we are a roadside family. But don’t fade out of my heart, We’ve known each other too long It's out of our controlling grasp now  You’re the worst and best part of me
10.
SHIPWRECKS 02:56
Yes I'm lonely, but I know its better company                             I'm always biting my fingers  Why does sour blood give me relief  Oh you’ve left again, and the scars are building up  The air passing through my lungs calms me down At least my knuckles are strong like leather so I can punch I need a stronger soul than the one I hold  My dreams are always about shipwrecks  We are in the boiling water without realising it,  Is this our first fight? I’m so afraid of this being real.                                                    Hate is the only emotion that I feel 
 I’m sick of the way you act,                                                            I guess some things never change. like my teeth sear and grind from the frustration of pain     You failed every test in my mind I made  All I ever got was cold radio silence                                                     Yes I’m lonely, but I know its better company  Yes I’m lonely, but I know its better company 
 Yes I’m lonely, but its better company                               Yes I know I’m lonely, but it’s better for me
11.
IMMORTALITY 05:12
What’s the point of swimming I’ve already drowned  You are my price of peace  My thoughts go in half  So it’s almost bearable.  I sink to the bottom but I can still hear your yells 
 Saying how are you has lost its meaning  I don’t think of you  I don’t think of you  I won’t  I won't come home  Perfect families aren’t real  I hope I move in with you before the sun destroys us all  Blood don't mean nothing if there isn’t love 
 Oh I’m fine with this id rather be hated  Oh I’m fine with this id rather be hated  Oh I’m fine id rather be hated  Oh I’m fine id rather be hated  Oh I’m fine id rather be hated  Oh I’m fine id rather be hated  Saying how are you has lost its meaning   I don’t think of you  I don’t think of you  I won’t  I won't come home  Perfect families aren’t real  I don’t think of you  I don’t think of you  I won’t  I'm giving myself meaning 

about

Vocals, Lyrics, Guitar, Percussion, Piano by Bridget Allan
Bass by Marlon Cini
Mixed+Mastered by Jordan Finlay
Drawing by @Marshall_Artists_
Thank you Nai Palm for inspiring this album!
Recorded by Bridget Allan, on the stolen lands of the Bunurong people of the Kulin Nation.

© Bridget Allan 2020. All rights reserved.

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released July 8, 2020

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Bridget Allan Melbourne, Australia

Bridget Allan is an indie/jazz-influenced singer-songwriter from the Mornington Peninsula. She is currently studying for a Bachelor of Music at the University of Melbourne, specialising in Jazz & Improvisation. Bridget’s most significant musical influences are Jeff Buckley and Florence + The Machine. ... more

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